I have some big news for you: apparently, Miley Cyrus can't be tamed. What the heck that means, none of us know. It has something to do with feathers and birdcages and gay backup dancers. That's right, friends, I'm watching the Dancing with the Stars results show again late at night after a long day, mixing in blog writing and a vodka lemonade, for good measure. Didn't we previously learn what a bad idea this is?
No matter. I have a point. I'm sure I have a point. Somewhere. Let's find it together, shall we?
Miley Cyrus. Where do I begin? I don't want to use the term "talentless hack" because I'm sure there's talent in there somewhere. But the girl is just that - a girl. She hasn't fully developed yet. And I'm not talking about her body, sickos, though it does concern me that she sounds like she's been on a pack a day since infancy. What I'm talking about is the fact that she hasn't fully developed as a talent. And it's evident in her career so far. Let's not pretend she didn't get that audition for Hannah Montana because of her achy breaky dad, Billy Ray. And the last time the country collectively agreed that nepotism was a good idea, we ended up with a two-term president who still didn't know how to pronounce "nuclear" after eight years.
Wow am I ever getting off point. That'd be the vodka lemonade talking. Well, that and common sense.
My point is that Miley Cyrus got her start as a performer for no reason other than being in the right place at the right time thanks to a father who found fame singing the wrong song at the wrong time (it works out if you think of "Achy Breaky Heart" being the right song during a time when everything, in retrospect, was just wrong, very, very wrong, a.k.a., 1992).
And here I've stumbled onto my point. Bright Ideas. You should really see this show. And if you've already seen it, you should see it again. I've seen it several times now (natch), and I always find something new on which to ponder. Why are Genevra and Joshua so obsessed with getting their son into that preschool? Is it really about what's best for their child, or are they more concerned with their own "status"? What does that mean about my parents, who put me in a Montessori preschool when I was that age? Did it make a difference? Is that why I'm a successful human being? Or am I successful? What is success? Does any of it really matter, anyway? Would I have been better off having skipped preschool and merely encourage my dad to contribute some cheesy lyrics to the line-dancing craze?
I'm just full of questions for which I have no answers. And that's why I love theater. You get something new every time!
The only thing I know for sure, though, is that I'm a child of the 80s. Which means my dad couldn't have written a cheesy song for the line-dancing craze that we (shamefully) saw in the early 90s. Perhaps if he'd jumped onto the Electric Slide bandwagon, my life would be different now. I could be the one shaking my tail feather (literally...there were a lot of feathers that I'm still desperately trying to connect to the song lyrics) on the Dancing with the Stars results show.
But with my luck, I'd just end up having some crazy, drunk guy write an incoherent blog post about me.
Wait...
I'll try to be a little bit less strange (but only the tiniest bit) next week.
Ryan Grimes
Managing Director
Urban Samurai Productions
No comments:
Post a Comment